At the beginning of this ordeal, we were given a paradigm that outlined the steps to curing my Hodgkin's lymphoma. It goes: Biopsy (check), PET scan (check), 8 things of chemo (almost check!), PET scan 2.0, and then the choice between two weeks of radiation and four more things of chemo.
So far, we've gone along with the assumption that radiation is really bad and scary and potentially dangerous, and that chemo was definitely the lesser of two evils. I resigned myself to another two months of feeling groggy, shaky, and under the weather, as well as potentially putting myself at risk for getting sick (thanks immuno-suppressors).
But after meeting with the radiation oncologist last Thursday, things sounded like they could potentially change. He explained that while radiation is an every day procedure, it only lasts for two, maybe three weeks. And while the area they would be targeting could potentially put me at risk for breast cancer, it is a pretty low percentage of people who get a second cancer due to radiation. If I went with radiation, I would have to take this risk, but I would be done with everything in November instead of December and hopefully start getting my life back in alignment.
Chemo now sounds like it has a lot of other negative side effects, including heart disease (which I'm already at risk for), leukemia, and lung toxicity. This would also completely bring my immune system down to 0 by the end of treatments, which would mean being extra careful while all of my peers are getting sick with colds and the flu.
No matter which I end up choosing, I don't really get to "win". Both have bad side effects and only a couple of advantages. I almost would rather have someone else choose for me, at least so I can "blame" someone else later on if something goes wrong. I know blame is the wrong thing to be seeking now, and it will be no one's fault if I get a negative side effect, but that's how I feel.
Friends who have gone through this (I'm looking at you, Melody! :)) what advice do you have? Are there any other reasons to choose chemo over radiation?
Current symptoms/side effects/general complaints: A lot of shakiness. My handwriting looks like that of a second grader. Little nausea.
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